I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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