she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
