This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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