Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I skipped work to stalk him.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
