I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Randomize
