So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
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