In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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