I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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