it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
