doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
