You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
