Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
