the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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