he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
