so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
