Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
