There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
