okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
