I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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