I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
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