she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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