and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
