This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
