Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
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