Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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