Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I'm jealous of your bromance
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
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I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
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He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
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