On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
