after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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