i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize