wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize