Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
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Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
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Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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