I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize