Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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