how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize