So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
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I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
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We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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