Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
