So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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