doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
