Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
