his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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