that's an acceptable place to lick
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
