Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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