good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
