all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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