is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
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