there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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