I'm going to jail i love you
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
