Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
