dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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