those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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