Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I think my vagina is haunted
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Did I show you my penis last night?
We are two peas in an std pod
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
