do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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